Sometimes I Just Want To Give Up – The Debt Struggle Is Real


The year is almost over and I am so far from my goal of being debt free. So far. But I try to stay positive. I try to write encouraging posts that inspire others. But today I don’t feel inspired or inspiring. Far from it. I honestly feel like giving up. You won’t find any nuggets of wisdom or great takeaways in this post. Today I’m just letting it all hang out – the good, the bad, and the frustrated.

I want to give up debt struggle

Sometimes I Just Want To Give Up

It wasn’t always like this. My day actually started on a really optimistic note. I was feeling good about my finances and the potential for success this month held. I had redeemed $10 of PayPal credit from an app and was sending it off as an extra debt payment (you know I love small payments). I came in under budget for the third week in a row at the grocery store – whoo hoo! I was feeling excited and hopeful.

But then the phone call came. The one telling me that a repair needed on my car is going to cost … $700. The sun stopped shining. Butterflies stopped flapping their wings. All of the rainbows and unicorns disappeared. Sorry for the dramatics, but it really felt like a punch in the stomach and I had to fight back tears. All of the small efforts I take every day to improve my finances, to get out of debt, to help my family live a better life – instantly wiped out. “What’s the point?” I think to myself. I just want to give up.

This is not the first time I have felt this way. There have been many days where I have felt discouraged. I love to post the positive and to share my successes, but the reality is that a lot of days suck.

The necessary car repair is the result of a dumb mistake. And it was totally my fault. There wasn’t an accident, and nobody was hurt. It was just a careless, rushed moment, where I was distracted by kids and my to do list. A $700 mistake that I am now beating myself up for.

I could take $700 out of my shiny new $1,000 emergency fund. But should I? Should I wipe out the hard fought goal I only just reached last month? It wasn’t an emergency, it was just stupidity. A careless moment that ended up costing me a lot.

This wasn’t the first time I wasted money by doing something stupid and it surely won’t be the last. In fact, I have a few more I have been meaning to write about.

The Debt Struggle Is Real

Sometimes I wonder, do my goals really matter? Am I obsessing over something (getting out of debt) that I shouldn’t? Do I need to let it go? It is incredibly frustrating to “do all the right things” and still feel like you’re never getting ahead.

The journey to get out of debt is long and it is hard. I want to give up. I am tired. Every day I wake up, get out of bed, and start TRYING. Trying to make money, trying to save money, trying to get my family out of debt and into a better financial place. I. Am. Exhausted. I want to give up.

But I also don’t want to struggle anymore. I don’t want to be in a place where $700 is a number that ruins my day, week, month, or year. I don’t want to live this life of endless payments and fees and interest. I don’t want to live every day of my life stressed over money. So I might cry into my pillow tonight over this unwanted setback, but I will wake up tomorrow and try again.

I can’t give up.

Anyone else ever feel like giving up? Have a vent in the comments below!

I want to give up debt struggle

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  1. I wish I could say I didn’t know how you feel, but I do. Keep going, there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

  2. I’m glad you ended this with getting up tomorrow and trying again. These set backs are awful. I has just paid off the roof loan and then the floors got flooded. I still haven’t gotten them repaired but that will be a huge expense. Several thousand at least and it makes me so mad. Just can’t get ahead. But it will happen one day right?
    Julie recently posted…10 Fun Fall Activities for the Whole FamilyMy Profile

    • Oh my goodness Julie, I’m so sorry to hear about the roof AND the floor! What a burden! I know you will get through it though! <3

  3. It can be difficult! My husband and I used to live paycheck to paycheck and we vowed to never do it again. We just started putting money back and not going out as much.

    Good luck and don’t give up!
    Amber Myers recently posted…Fall TV Shows To Watch (And To Skip)My Profile

    • Paycheck to paycheck is no way to live! That’s why I want to change our lives. Thanks for cheering me on Amber, I promise I won’t give up! 🙂

  4. Don’t give up!! We had a $1,000 car repair back in February that hit us hard. That kicked our butt and made me really discouraged, too.

    Last month, Hubby had to buy tires. It was an emergency in that it couldn’t possibly wait. But it also wasn’t, because it’s not like we could expect tires to last forever. Either way, we chose to use our emergency cash, and then refilled it using the extra debt payments we usually make.

    That was discouraging because we didn’t dig out of debt at all that month. But also encouraging, because we established a new habit of not throwing things on a credit card!

    That might not work in your situation, but keep trying! I know you can do it.
    Jamie @ Medium Sized Family recently posted…5 Ways We’ve Saved Money This Week 53My Profile

    • We bought tires last month too Jamie! So frustrating because we were setting aside cash for them, but just needed them a little sooner than expected. I really think I’m going to tap the brand new emergency fund for this situation! So much better than adding on more debt!

  5. I always feel like giving up on debt repayment! The fact that you don’t is why you will be successful! Getting out of debt is not for the faint hearted or faint minded. It takes time, dedication, and perseverance! You’ve got this! Like my husband always says, “if it were east, every one would do it!”.

    As far at that $700 repair goes, my two-cents say use your emergency fund; that’s what it’s there for. It may have been carelessness that caused the repair, but it’s still an unexpected expense. On the bright side, you won’t fall further into debt to take care of it and you built a $1000 emergency fund once, you can do it again!

    • I really think we will be dipping into the emergency fund Brandy! Thank you for your thoughtful comment and you are so right – I built up the emergency fund once so that means I can do it again!

  6. Unexpected expenses like that are the worst! So sorry to hear you’re having a rough day. I went through something similar recently when my computer died unexpectedly and I had to replace it… But you can definitely reach your goals, this is just a temporary set-back!

  7. You got this! Stay focused and positive. Keep doing what you have to do and soon you’ll find yourself debt-free!
    katrinajeancarter recently posted…Favorite 5: Equipment To Stay Fit At HomeMy Profile

  8. We all want to give up sometimes but we can’t! You’re doing great so keep going. It will be so empowering when you’re finally debt-free — and you will be!

  9. It can definitely be hard to try and get out of the debt that you may have put yourself in. I have wanted to throw in the towel multiple times, but never have.

  10. Yes I have felt that way before. In the past sometimes things have gotten really hard. Work through it. Don’t give up.

  11. They say it’s a bunch of little consistent steps until one day you wake up and are where you want to be. 🙂 Good luck to you!

  12. We went through a similar situation after our second child was born. My husband had switched jobs and I was home with our newborn and three-year-old son. It wasn’t easy, but we’ve been able to cut back on things and pay the bills we were behind on.

  13. We talk about getting out of debt like it’s one big thing. But getting out of debt is actually thousands of small things: making the right decisions day after day after day and not giving up. It’s absolutely alright to vent, especially on those days when it doesn’t feel like you’re moving forward. But tomorrow will come and then it’s time to try again. You can do it!
    Gary @ Super Saving Tips recently posted…Why You Need Life Insurance Whether You’re Young or OldMy Profile

  14. Financial goals can be extremely frustrating. We’ve had more than a few setbacks this year ourselves. I’m finding that accepting the ebbs and flows as a part of it, rather than obsessing over success, brings a lot more peace. Easier said than done, I know.
    FF @ Femme Frugality recently posted…8 Ways to Help Loved Ones in Abusive RelationshipsMy Profile

  15. I feel your pain on this topic. My goal while not to be 100% debt free but to have it so I’m only using less than half of my credit card balances. It is a struggle to get to that goal and I think there will always be set backs. But a good side to it is if you are trying your bets that is really all you can do and you are doing it with the best intentions.
    Crystal Gard recently posted…Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance DayMy Profile

  16. I’m sure it can feel so daunting, but the fact that you’re dedicated means you’ll make it!

  17. I’m so sorry about that mama but keep your chin up, you can do this. I think it’s great that you have debt-free goals because so many people don’t even think about that. I know you can do it, don’t give up! And keep us posted.

  18. Totally been there!! Thanks for being real! I know it sounds crazy but if you feel thankful for the money do have (instead of all the debt) you’ll find that more of it starts to flow in. Focus on the positive – easier said than done, I know 🙂

    • I absolutely love that perspective Michelle, so thanks for taking the time to comment. I really do want to incorporate more gratitude into my routine moving forward! 🙂

  19. You just need to keep at it. We all get to a point where we want to give up. That’s usually right before the magic happens.
    Milena recently posted…Boo It Forward with Ghostbusters on Blu-ray #BooItForward #Halloween #SonyPicturesMy Profile

  20. I want to give up! It’s so hard for me to out in the debt our salary is not enough for paying our debts. So frustating

  21. I could go on about this. In February we were debt free aside from our mortgage…husband lost his job and it has been downhill from there. I am so over it.

    • Laura I am so sorry to hear about your husband’s job loss. That is really tough and I have been there personally. Hang in there and please don’t ever hesitate to reach out for help, or even just to vent! <3

  22. There will be times like these when we feel like we’ve wasted all our efforts for nothing. All I can say is that, you have to keep going, you’ve done so well with saving and if you keep doing what you’re doing before then it will all pay off. A little patience goes a long way especially when it comes to reaching your goals. Don’t give up!

  23. Debts will really drag you down and it will make you feel like you’re working for nothing. I know having the car repaired sounds like a total waste of money but if your family benefits from it then I think it’s worth it.
    Carol Cassara recently posted…When apologies are not really apologiesMy Profile

  24. Debt free. That sounds amazing. Sorry to hear about the unexpected repair. Nothing worse than having to spend money on a car. Ugh. Keep going, you’re doing great!

  25. stay strong! i don’t have any credits or debts but i know way too many people who are struggling to pay them back

  26. It’s really hard to get out on a debt, That is one of my prayers to get out of all my debt.

  27. It’s not always going to be easy, and you’re absolutely allowed to feel frustrated. Wallow in it for a day or so, and then get back to it. 🙂
    Samantha @ Momma Wants Java recently posted…The Beginner’s Guide to Bullet JournalingMy Profile

  28. Ugh, I am so sorry!! That’s such a crappy feeling to finally reach the goal and have it snatched back – BUT you are able to weather this because of that savings account, which is awesome and way better than going into debt. I honestly feel like it took me like 5 years to start to have a halfway decent grasp on my finances and it’s only the last year or two where a $700 bill would just make me sigh and minorly irritate me rather than throw me into a tailspin. You’re making great decisions financially – stick with them! It is super hard, but it’s worth it.
    Mel @ brokeGIRLrich recently posted…Why My 30s Are Financially Rocking So FarMy Profile

  29. I know what you mean, becoming debt free is hard. I usually find that a good cry helps and then it is on to getting the problem solved. You can do it!
    Kerri recently posted…A Letter to my Teen and Tween – GO BIG #YoplaitGoBigMy Profile

  30. Surrender is not an option. Wow, that sounds fine and strong, doesn’t it. Fact is, I know preeecisely what it feels like to be far too near the edge of the waterfall and to want nothing more than to stop paddling. Know what helps? Expressing it. You’re already doing what makes it better.


    Oh my good glad i saw this today.
    My husbsnd said im obsessed with getting out of debit…..
    My son just got in a car accident yesterday. He is find but we have got to pay for tow.
    My husband said its not woth cutting internet cable
    I.dont put the heat on .
    And grocery s are a big expense.
    Im sorry got to vent

    • I understand the need to vent Patricia! Life can get very overwhelming sometimes, and debt makes it all even more stressful. I’m glad your son is okay!

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